BREAKING: MICHAEL BLOOMBERG TO CONVERT TO CHRISTIAN FAITH

Days after New York City's mayor Michael Bloomberg filed forms to leave the Republican Party, the billionaire shocked the nation again by announcing that he was leaving Judaism to become Episcopalian.

"I have nothing against Judaism," Bloomberg assured reporters from a pulpit in Pasadena, California. "It's just that, after practicing Reform Judaism for my entire life, I have somehow reformed myself...into a Christian!"

Like many other well-known Republicans, Bloomberg has undergone a number of changes in recent years. Well-established as a businessman and life-long Democrat, he switched his political allegiance to the Republican Party around the time that he declared his intention to enter mayoral politics. As a "born-again" Republican and newly elected mayor of New York, Bloomberg showed his enthusiasm for his newly adopted and then-powerful political party through large contributions and mass arrests of peaceful demonstrators and passersby during the 2004 Republican Convention. Now in his second and final term as mayor, Bloomberg attracted national attention yesterday when, rudely interrupted by the press while idly passing time in California, he explained that he was abandoning the now-weakened Republican Party to better reflect his latest political leanings.

Bloomberg, who has stated that he pictures himself living a life of philanthropy after his mayorship ends, is said to have already shown characteristic largess to his new religious faith through seven-figure donations, an invitation for the church to hold its 2007 convention in New York City, and a pledge to arrest and detain hundreds of law-abiding citizens should the church accept his invitation.

There are, however, rumors that Bloomberg is actually considering a run for the Presidency as part of his preparation to become a full-time philanthropist. The whispers persist despite Bloomberg's constant evasions.

"I assure everyone that none of my plans for the future have changed. I'm the same Michael I've always been," said Bloomberg as he left for a lunch of roast beef, mayonnaise, and Wonder Bread sandwiches.

Photo: David Marc Fischer