Cartoon Caption/Anti-Caption Contest Coverage Continues!

The winner of Caption Contest 181 (Sidney Harris's Stonehengey construction site) is

"Tell me you kept the box and receipt."
Jae Choe (New York, NY)

This brings New York's wins to 30, boosting the Empire State to within one point of California!


The nominees in Caption Contest 183 (Tom Cheney's car crashing into bedroom) are

"Well, at least he made curfew."
Andrea Fidurko (Needham, MA)

"I thought our sex life was a train wreck."
Stevan Savich (Crown Point, IN)

"We should tell the G.P.S. people that they changed the off-ramp."
Georgia Gebhardt (Wilmette, IL)

My loser:

"Now neither of us has to walk Fido."

The Anti-Caption Contest is returning from a hiatus, but not entirely up-to-speed.


Caption Contest 185 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 185 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all (almost) mapped out here.

31 California

30 New York (26 from the Big Apple)

13 New Jersey

10 Virginia (four from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Newport News, one from Roanoke, one from Stanardsville)

9 Illinois (seven from Chicago, two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)

8 Massachusetts

6 Connecticut (two from New Haven, four not)
6 North Carolina (two from Charlotte)
6 Pennsylvania

5 Maryland (none named Mary)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Arizona (two from Tucson)
4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Ohio

3 Michigan
3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 Rhode Island
3 Washington

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Utah
2 Vermont

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Louisiana (New Orleans)
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Parodic The Gothamer illustration realized by Deborah Grumet from concept by David Marc Fischer

Cartoon Caption/Anti-Caption Contest Coverage Continues

Happy Birthday to Deborah Grumet, artiste behind that wonderful illustration on the right!

The winner of Caption Contest 178 (Tom Cheney's escaped prisoner at a bar) is

"Most men drink to escape. I escape to drink."
Douglas Buck (Flint, MI)

That's the third win for Michigan!


The nominees in Caption Contest 180 (Paul Noth's liferaft survivors eating fruit off a Carmen Miranda-like skeleton) are

"Here's to Little Miss 'Don't You Touch My Hat.'"
Kevin Forhan (Seattle, WA)

"She should have told us the fruit was real."
T. J. Tu (Douglaston, NY)

"I didn't expect to gain weight on this cruise."
Andrea B. Hollingshead (Manhattan Beach, CA)

My loser:

"Her act dates back to the 1940s, but some of it remains remarkably fresh to this day."

Maybe I should have left off the adverb?


The winner of Anti-Caption Contest 181 has not been determined at the time of this post. Maybe Dan Radosh is looking for my submission—but I didn't make one! Hah!!


Caption Contest 182 here Anti-Caption Contest 181 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all (almost) mapped out here.

31 California

29 New York (25 from the Big Apple)

13 New Jersey

10 Virginia (four from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Newport News, one from Roanoke, one from Stanardsville)

9 Illinois (seven from Chicago, two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)

8 Massachusetts

6 Connecticut (two from New Haven, four not)
6 Pennsylvania

5 Maryland (none named Mary)
5 North Carolina (two from Charlotte)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Arizona (two from Tucson)
4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Ohio

3 Michigan
3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 Rhode Island

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Utah
2 Vermont
2 Washington

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Louisiana (New Orleans)
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Parodic The Gothamer illustration realized by Deborah Grumet from concept by David Marc Fischer

Cartoon Caption/Anti-Caption Contest Coverage Continues

The winner of Caption Contest 176 (Mick Stevens's wreck of a court) is

"For a divorce case, that went smoothly."
Ann Seger (Chicago, IL)

Illinois pulls ahead of Massachusetts to take fifth place with this ninth win, the seventh for Chicago.


The nominees in Caption Contest 178 (Tom Cheney's prison fugitive at a bar) are

"If anybody calls, I'm not here."
Iver Peterson (Lawrenceville, NJ)

"I'd kill for some peanuts."
Adam Cooper (Los Angeles, CA)

"Most men drink to escape. I escape to drink."
Douglas Buck (Flint, MI)

My loser:

"I'll have a screwdriver. I already have a pick and a shovel."

The winner of Anti-Caption Contest 178 (Tom Cheney's prison fugitive #64) is

"Way I see it, drowning yer sorrows is like drowning yer kids -- gotta make sure there ain't no more bubbles before you start on the next one."
Jared S.

My loser:

"The minute I finish this beer, I'll go back and help Number Six! (Pause) Actually...this beer is so good I think I'll have another one. What's the rush, you know? He can wait."

"As soon as I was assigned this number, I got old and started losing my hair. How is that possible?"

The winner of Anti-Caption Contest 179 (Ethan Kanin's bandaged doctor with boy patient) is

"I'll be taking over your regular doctor's patients for a while. He was in an accident."
stcoleridge

My losers:

"Here's an idea: I'll watch while you examine yourself! Heh heh heh heh. You know, I've still got two good legs. Heh heh heh heh. But seriously, do as I say. Heh heh heh heh. Seriously."

Caption Contest 180 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 180 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all (almost) mapped out here.

30 California

29 New York (25 from the Big Apple)

13 New Jersey

10 Virginia (four from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Newport News, one from Roanoke, one from Stanardsville)

9 Illinois (seven from Chicago, two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)

8 Massachusetts

6 Connecticut (two from New Haven, four not)
6 Pennsylvania

5 Maryland (none named Mary)
5 North Carolina (two from Charlotte)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Arizona (two from Tucson)
4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Ohio

3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 Rhode Island

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Michigan
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Utah
2 Vermont
2 Washington

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Louisiana (New Orleans)
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Parodic The Gothamer illustration realized by Deborah Grumet from concept by David Marc Fischer

Cartoon Caption/Anti-Caption Contest Coverage Continues

The winner of Caption Contest 175 (Drew Dernavich's guy with assorted outdoorsy accessories) is

"In this economy, you have to let the vacation come to you."
Michael Soskis (Cambridge, MA)

Massachusetts is now tied with Illinois for fifth place—and New York fails to tie California for first.


The nominees in Caption Contest 177 (Leo Cullum's captive with mismatched foot pails) are

"It's sloppy work like that that gives the mob a bad name."
Gordon Baumbacher (Kentfield, CA)

"We are trying to reduce our concrete footprint."
Tim Wilcox (Milwaukee, WI)

"Two weeks ago, this was not considered torture."
Avery Clapsaddle (Neche, ND)

My loser:

"If you let me know which you prefer, I'll find the match for the other one."

I am still awaiting the results of Anti-Caption Contest 178 (Tom Cheney's prisoner excapes into a bar...).


Caption Contest 179 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 179 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all (almost) mapped out here.

30 California

29 New York (25 from the Big Apple)

13 New Jersey

10 Virginia (four from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Newport News, one from Roanoke, one from Stanardsville)

8 Illinois (six from Chicago, two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)
8 Massachusetts

6 Connecticut (two from New Haven, four not)
6 Pennsylvania

5 Maryland (none named Mary)
5 North Carolina (two from Charlotte)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Arizona (two from Tucson)
4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Ohio

3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 Rhode Island

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Michigan
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Utah
2 Vermont
2 Washington

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Louisiana (New Orleans)
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Parodic The Gothamer illustration realized by Deborah Grumet from concept by David Marc Fischer

Cartoon Caption/Anti-Caption Contest Coverage Continues

What would New York do without champion captioner Lynn Tudor, whose second triumph came in Caption Contest 173 (Tom Cheney's businessmen lugging loads of money) with

"At the next bailout, let's also ask for a pony."

Due to Tudor's affinity for Cheney cartoons, New York is now within one point of longtime leader California!


The nominees in Caption Contest 175 (Drew Dernavich's guy wearing lots of sports stuff) are

"In this economy, you have to let the vacation come to you."
Michael Soskis (Cambridge, MA)

"He's pretty much up for anything."
Kevin Kozee (Marietta, GA)

"He has recreational A.D.D."
Mark Kane (Bayside, NY)

No submission from me, folks.


The winner of Anti-Caption Contest 176 (Mick Stevens's disorder in the court) is

"Mr. foreman, you being an upside-down chair makes me concerned about your potential bias in a case involving other unruly furniture."
Damon

My loser:

Outtake from What's Up, Doc? (Peter Bogdanovich, 1972)

Caption Contest 177 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 177 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all (almost) mapped out here.

30 California

29 New York (25 from the Big Apple)

13 New Jersey

9 Virginia (four from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Newport News, one from Roanoke)

8 Illinois (six from Chicago, two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)

7 Massachusetts

6 Connecticut (two from New Haven, four not)
6 Pennsylvania

5 Maryland (none named Mary)
5 North Carolina (two from Charlotte)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Arizona (two from Tucson)
4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Ohio

3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 Rhode Island

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Michigan
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Utah
2 Vermont
2 Washington

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Louisiana (New Orleans)
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Parodic The Gothamer illustration realized by Deborah Grumet from concept by David Marc Fischer

Cartoon Caption/Anti-Caption Contest Coverage Resumes

There's some catching up to do, so....

The winner of Caption Contest 171 (Gahan Wilson's butcher with kickline display of meat) is

"I'd suggest you keep them away from the gingerbread men."
Vincent Coca (Staten Island, NY)

That's a first win for the Shaolin!


The winner of Caption Contest 172 (happy head on Easter Island) is

"Guess who's getting voted off the island."
Michael Vorenberg (Barrington, RI)

This third win for Rhode Island ties the tiny state with Al Franken-lovin' Minnesota!


The nominees in Caption Contest 173 (Tom Cheney's businessmen hauling loads of moolah) are

"Who would have thought they'd actually give money to a bank!"
Michael Jensen (New Rochelle, NY)

"At the next bailout, let's also ask for a pony."
Lynn Tudor (New York, NY)

"Did you send your thank-you card to Congress?"
Harvey Kaslow (Pasadena, CA)

Yes, that's at least Lynn Tudor's fourth nomination after Caption Contest 80, Caption Contest 117, and Caption Contest 120 (a win).

My loser:

"I used to sell strip steaks, but they cleaned up their act."

You like??


The nominees in Caption Contest 174 (Harry Bliss's little man, big bird with worm in beak) are

"I want to live at my dad's."
Sean Delaney (Stanardsville, VA)

"No, thanks—I only eat them on reality shows."
Sean Lee (Brooklyn, NY)

"Am I in your dream or are you in mine?"
Joe Sherlock (Omaha, NE)

My loser:

"I appreciate the gesture, but I'm just not into you."

The winner of Anti-Caption Contest 174 (Harry Bliss's little man, big bird with worm in beak) is

The Worm: "Please, my little elven friend, stop gaping and get me out of this bird's mouth before it eats me!"
Ed

My loser:

"Go ahead and PECK me to death, starting with my balls! That would still be nothing compared to what that ganef Bernie Madoff did to me."

In Anti-Caption Contest 175 (Drew Dernavich's person in hybrid sports getup), the winner is

"Him? This is my idiot friend Steve. He used to be... are you wearing a fucking yarmulke?"
Hubert

Nothing from me on this one.


Caption Contest 176 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 176 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all mapped out here.

30 California

28 New York (24 from the Big Apple)

13 New Jersey

9 Virginia (four from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Newport News, one from Roanoke)

8 Illinois (six from Chicago, two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)

7 Massachusetts

6 Connecticut (two from New Haven, four not)
6 Pennsylvania

5 Maryland (none named Mary)
5 North Carolina (two from Charlotte)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Arizona (two from Tucson)
4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Ohio

3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 Rhode Island

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Michigan
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Utah
2 Vermont
2 Washington

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Louisiana (New Orleans)
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Parodic The Gothamer illustration realized by Deborah Grumet from concept by David Marc Fischer

Cartoon Caption/Anti-Caption Contest Coverage Continues

It's apparently time for a pause at the Caption and Anti-Caption Contests, but I do note that the winner of Anti-Caption Contest 173 (Tom Cheney's businessmen with cartloads of cash) is

"I never thought that line about my red wagon, laundry cart, and suitcase business being too big to fail would ever work, but boy howdy, did it ever!"
bunsen

Kudos to Deborah for her Honorable Mention with

"See, this is why I became a taxidermist. To make piles and piles and piles of money."

My clever losers:

"That new partner sure delivers!"

"I never thought being bailed out would be so much fun!" (Apologies to Carolita Johnson!)

Caption Contest 174 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 174 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all mapped out here.

30 California

27 New York (23 from the Big Apple)

13 New Jersey

9 Virginia (four from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Newport News, one from Roanoke)

8 Illinois (six from Chicago, two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)

7 Massachusetts

6 Connecticut (two from New Haven, four not)
6 Pennsylvania

5 Maryland (none named Mary)
5 North Carolina (two from Charlotte)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Arizona (two from Tucson)
4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Ohio

3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Michigan
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Rhode Island
2 Utah
2 Vermont
2 Washington

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Louisiana (New Orleans)
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Satirical "Eustace K. Tilley" illustration realized by Deborah Grumet from concept by David Marc Fischer

Cartoon Caption/Anti-Caption Contest Coverage Continues

The winner of Cartoon Contest 170 (P.C. Vey's businessman carrying fowl carcass) is

"I miss the cash bonuses."
Robert Becker (Northford, CT)

Congrats to Becker and Connecticut, which won out over contest leaders California and New York!


The nominees in Contest 172 (Lee Lorenz's grinning head on Easter Island) are

"We really need to revisit our immigration policy."
Robert Marinai (Oakland, CA)

"Ah, the innocence of youth."
Steve Rappaport (Brooklyn, NY)

"Guess who's getting voted off the island."
Michael Vorenberg (Barrington, RI)

My loser:

Obama Island

There are no results for Anti-Caption Contest 173 (Tom Cheney's money-carriers) at the time of this posting.


Caption Contest 174 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 174 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all mapped out here.

30 California

27 New York (23 from the Big Apple)

13 New Jersey

9 Virginia (four from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Newport News, one from Roanoke)

8 Illinois (six from Chicago, two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)

7 Massachusetts

6 Connecticut (two from New Haven, four not)
6 Pennsylvania

5 Maryland (none named Mary)
5 North Carolina (two from Charlotte)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Arizona (two from Tucson)
4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Ohio

3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Michigan
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Rhode Island
2 Utah
2 Vermont
2 Washington

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Louisiana (New Orleans)
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Satirical "Eustace K. Tilley" illustration realized by Deborah Grumet from concept by David Marc Fischer

Cartoon Caption/Anti-Caption Contest Coverage Continues

It took a while for Dan Radosh to post the results of Anti-Caption Contest 170 (P.C. Vey's businessman with turkey) but, when he did, Deborah was quick to let me know that I'd garnered an Honorable Mention with

"I'm on my way to get a breast implant. Wish me luck, dawg!"

The winner was

"Yeah, that's the thing with Rate My Professor, you never really know who's trashin' ya. TurkeylovingRacist1956 could be anybody."
David John

I had no such luck in Anti-Caption Contest 171 (Gahan Wilson's butcher selling meat shaped like a kick line), where the winner was

"I don't know, lady. I just fucking work here. Do you want one or not"
JohnnyB

and one of the Honorable Mentions was the great Broadway pun

"So you want one...singular...shank section?"
therblig

and my losers were

"Pleased to meat you!"

and

"If you don't think the world is fucked up, just take a look at the numbers of each of these anti-caption contests.

"This one is 171, the one before it is 247, the one before that is 170, and the one before that is 168!

"It reminds me of when the contest went from 141 to 143 to 143, but it's worse this time around.

"Anyway, what'll it be?"

"It depends. What's today's special?"

"Tenderloins."

"Of course. Then I'll have those."

"I'm sure you already do, my lovely. I'm sure you already do."

"Oh dear!"

In Caption Contest 168 (Tom Cheney's weirdly long arm of waiter), the winner is

"Please try not to stare at his disproportionately short right arm."
Chas Kikel (Cleveland Heights, OH)

Seems like an anti-caption, doesn't it?


In Caption Contest 170 (P.C. Vey's businessman with turkey) the nominees are

"I am useless until I have my morning turkey."
Corey Lowney (Wappingers Falls, NY)

"I was actually hoping for a boy."
Antonia Boyette (Los Angeles, CA)

"I miss the cash bonuses."
Robert Becker (Northford, CT)

Compare that third one with my loser:

"It's part of my severance package."

Caption Contest 172 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 172 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all mapped out here.

29 California

27 New York (23 from the Big Apple)

13 New Jersey

9 Virginia (four from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Newport News, one from Roanoke)

8 Illinois (six from Chicago, two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)

7 Massachusetts

6 Pennsylvania

5 Connecticut (two from New Haven, three not)
5 Maryland (none named Mary)
5 North Carolina (two from Charlotte)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Arizona (two from Tucson)
4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Ohio

3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Michigan
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Rhode Island
2 Utah
2 Vermont
2 Washington

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Louisiana (New Orleans)
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Satirical "Eustace K. Tilley" illustration realized by Deborah Grumet from concept by David Marc Fischer

Cartoon Caption/Anti-Caption Contest Coverage Continues

Poor Frank Campanella of New York—nominated twice within a matter of weeks, he again falls short. In Caption Contest 166 (Farley Katz's two "mummies" in bed), which was won by

"No, no—you're the archeologist this time!"
Eric Reid (Natick, MA)

So Massachusetts breaks away from Pennsylvania to claim the sixth-place posiiton. And this is the second win for Natick.


In Caption Contest 168 (Tom Cheney's long arm of food server in restaurant), the nominees are:

"Apparently, even the Fantastic Four can feel the pinch of the recession."
Marlene Goodman (Wheeling, IL)

"Please try not to stare at his disproportionately short right arm."
Chas Kikel (Cleveland Heights, OH)

"The first course has been described as a taste explosion."
Chuck Skeens (Albuquerque, NM)

My loser:

"They promised us some privacy."

In Anti-Caption Contest 168, the winner is

"Remember when you said you couldn't decide between a nice meal out or going to the freak tent at the circus? Well, I've got a surprise for you... I'm fucking your sister."
Mork

My loser:

"Do you have a problem eatin' handouts? 'Cause if you think that's
shockin', try Alex Gregory's Japanese restaurant, where the sushi chef is
a squid, and see how that grabs ya!"

The winner of Anti-Caption Contest 169 (Leo Cullum's businessman in serape) is

"The gypsy's enigmatic words, 'You will be haunted by your identical Latino cowboy twin', proved to be prophetic."
Clambone

My loser:

"Amigo! Did you know that Katz's still has a sign that says 'Send a Salami to Your Boy in the Army'?"

Caption Contest 170 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 170 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all mapped out here.

29 California

27 New York (23 from the Big Apple)

13 New Jersey

9 Virginia (four from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Newport News, one from Roanoke)

8 Illinois (six from Chicago, two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)

7 Massachusetts

6 Pennsylvania

5 Connecticut (two from New Haven, three not)
5 North Carolina (two from Charlotte)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Arizona (two from Tucson)
4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Maryland (none named Mary)

3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 Ohio

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Michigan
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Rhode Island
2 Utah
2 Vermont
2 Washington

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Louisiana (New Orleans)
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Satirical "Eustace K. Tilley" illustration realized by Deborah Grumet from concept by David Marc Fischer

Cartoon Caption/Anti-Caption Contest Coverage Continues

The winner of Caption Contest 160 (Tom Cheney's Hell House) is

"The seller is extremely motivated."
Mariam Erenburg (New York, NY)

New York is now within three points of longtime leader California.


In Caption Contest 162 (Robert Mankoff's man walking a snake or leash), the nominees are

"Relax, she prefers dachshunds."
Chas Kikel (Cleveland Heights, OH)

"Let's just say it attracts a more interesting type of woman."
Rosi Kaufman (Praire Village, KS)

"Don't look now, but I believe your snake is strangling that dog."
Samantha Church (Chicago, IL)

Nothing from me this time, you lucky dogs!


The winner of Anti-Caption Contest 163 (P.C. Vey's man at lectern in restaurant) is

"I'm debating you. Go to your podium, bitch!"
njtotx

Nothing from me this week, either.


Caption Contest 164 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 164 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all mapped out here.

29 California

26 New York (23 from the Big Apple)

13 New Jersey

8 Virginia (three from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Newport News, one from Roanoke)

6 Massachusetts
6 Pennsylvania

5 Connecticut (two from New Haven, three not)
5 Illinois (four from Chicago—two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)
5 North Carolina (two from Charlotte)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Arizona (two from Tucson)
4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Maryland (none named Mary)

3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 Ohio

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Michigan
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Rhode Island
2 Utah
2 Vermont
2 Washington

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Louisiana (New Orleans)
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Satirical "Eustace K. Tilley" illustration realized by Deborah Grumet from concept by David Marc Fischer

Cartoon Caption/Anti-Caption Contest Coverage Continues

The winner of Caption Contest 158 (Zachary Kanin's boy amidst heads in sand) is

"You got that? Three bottled waters, two sodas, one coffee, and six straws."
Robin McCauley (Newport News, VA)

Thus Virginia continues its relatively recent ascent in the standings.


In Caption Contest 160 (Tom Cheney's hell house for sale), the nominees are

"The heating system is pretty old but very reliable."
Shawna Bryan (Andover, OH)

"I strongly recommend that you read the fine print on this one."
Phil Schatz (New York, NY)

"The seller is extremely motivated."
Mariam Erenburg (New York, NY)

My loser:

"This one has been on the market for an eternity."

The winner of Anti-Caption Contest 161? You'll have to wait due to technical difficulties over at Radosh.net.


Caption Contest 162 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 162 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all mapped out here.

29 California

25 New York (22 from the Big Apple)

13 New Jersey

8 Virginia (three from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Newport News, one from Roanoke)

6 Massachusetts
6 Pennsylvania

5 Connecticut (two from New Haven, three not)
5 Illinois (four from Chicago—two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)
5 North Carolina (two from Charlotte)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Maryland (none named Mary)

3 Arizona (two from Tucson)
3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 Ohio

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Michigan
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Rhode Island
2 Utah
2 Vermont
2 Washington

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Louisiana (New Orleans)
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Satirical "Eustace K. Tilley" illustration realized by Deborah Grumet from concept by David Marc Fischer

Cartoon Caption/Anti-Caption Contest Coverage Continues

The winner of Caption Contest 157 (Mick Stevens's living-room view of the cosmos) is

"Five hundred billion galaxies and nothing's on."
Tom Elia (New York, NY)

So New York is again five points beyond longtime leader California.


In Caption Contest 159 (Drew Dernavich's giant coffee mugs—one with tea—on a conference table), the nominees are

"Can you please pass the cow?"
Bennett Ellenbogen (Brooklyn, NY)

"Let me start by welcoming you all to Narcoleptics Anonymous."
Mike Worth (West Chester, PA)

"By a 9-0 vote, the rest-room expansion project is approved."
Jon Thompson (Sedona, AZ)

My loser:

"Who gets the lemon wedge?"

Close to Bennett Ellenbogen, but the opposite, yet still about as funny?


The winner of Anti-Caption Contest 160 (Tom Cheney's suburban hell house) is

"The devil you can get rid of; it's cat piss that never goes away."
Weller

My loser:

Neewollah Orrazib

Sigh.


Caption Contest 161 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 161 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all mapped out here.

29 California

25 New York (22 from the Big Apple)

13 New Jersey

7 Virginia (three from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Roanoke)

6 Massachusetts
6 Pennsylvania

5 Connecticut (two from New Haven, three not)
5 Illinois (four from Chicago—two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)
5 North Carolina (two from Charlotte)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Maryland (none named Mary)

3 Arizona (two from Tucson)
3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 Ohio

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Michigan
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Rhode Island
2 Utah
2 Vermont
2 Washington

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Louisiana (New Orleans)
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Satirical "Eustace K. Tilley" illustration realized by Deborah Grumet from concept by David Marc Fischer

Cartoon Caption/Anti-Caption Coverage Continues!

The winner of Caption Contest 151 (Tom Cheney's office with giant pencils and giant sharpener) is is

"Let's continue this discussion over a hot barrel of coffee."
Adam Caraher (New York, NY)

So with this 23rd win, New York stays within five points of front-runner California...and the Big Apple alone reaches a whopping 20 wins! If my count is correct, that is.


In Caption Contest 153 (Leo Cullum's courtroom with female kickline), the nominees are

"I know you have the law and the facts on your side, but I'm going with the dancing girls on this one."
Mark Nebrig (Charlotte, NC)

"The jury foreman will now sing the verdict."
Hughes Richardson (Afton, OK)

"Overruled, counsellor. This is sweeps week."
Joseph Taylor (Beaufort, SC)

My loser:

"Now that's what I call an entertainment lawyer!"

The winner of Anti-Caption Contest 154 (Drew Dernavich's marshmallow roast over burning conference table) is

"Well, if none of you brought marshmallows and I didn't bring marshmallows then that explains why these marshmallows taste like mice."
TG Gibbon

My loser:

"Yes, yes, yes, Carruthers. The marshmallows are gluten-free. How many times do I have to tell you?"

Caption Contest 155 is here, while Anti-Caption Contest 155 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all mapped out here.

28 California

23 New York (20 from the Big Apple)

12 New Jersey

7 Virginia (three from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Roanoke)

6 Massachusetts
6 Pennsylvania

5 Connecticut (two from New Haven, three not)
5 Illinois (four from Chicago—two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Maryland (none named Mary)
4 North Carolina

3 Arizona (two from Tucson)
3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 Ohio

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Michigan
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Rhode Island
2 Utah
2 Vermont
2 Washington

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

"Eustace K. Tilley" illustration realized by Deborah Grumet from concept by David Marc Fischer

CARTOON CAPTION/ANTI-CAPTION COVERAGE CONTINUES!

First things first: In honor of this week's New Yorker cover, I replaced the usual illustration with a rare and oddly lit Reconstruction-era portrait of Eustace K. Tilley (right). It's only fitting, don't you agree?


The Cartoon Caption Contest had some trouble revving up today, but now I can tell you that the winner of Caption Contest 149 (Mick Stevens's guy with jet pack) is

"Apparently, American now charges extra for landings."
Steve Hoglund (Auburn, WA)

In Caption Contest 151 (Tom Cheney's desk scene with giant pencils and sharpener), the nominees are

"Let's continue this discussion over a hot barrel of coffee."
Adam Caraher (New York, NY)

"But I have to warn you, carpal tunnel here is a bitch."
Sam Cobean (Falmouth, ME)

"'How many accountants does it take to sharpen a pencil?' you ask? In this case five."
Matt Aucoin (Woodstock, VT)

Note the somewhat complex punctuation of the third candidate. And note that my loser was

"Sharpened properly, these pencils are mightier than pens."

There are no Anti-Caption winners this week, but Dan Radosh did score a Q&A with current contest gatekeeper Farley Katz.


Caption Contest 153 is here, while Anti-Caption Contest 153 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all mapped out here.

27 California

22 New York (19 from the Big Apple)

12 New Jersey

7 Virginia (three from NOVA, two from Richmond, one from Charlottesville, one from Roanoke)

6 Massachusetts
6 Pennsylvania

5 Connecticut (two from New Haven, three not)
5 Illinois (four from Chicago—two captions by Lawrence Wood, two drawings by Leo Cullum)
5 Texas (three from Houston)

4 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
4 Maryland (none named Mary)
4 North Carolina

3 Arizona (two from Tucson)
3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 Ohio

2 Alaska
2 District of Columbia
2 Florida
2 Michigan
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Rhode Island
2 Utah
2 Vermont
2 Washington

1 Alabama
1 Arkansas
1 Delaware
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Wisconsin

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Portrait of Eustace K. Tilley by David Marc Fischer

CARTOON CAPTION/ANTI-CAPTION CONTESTS CONTINUE!

Today New York City is Tudor City, because oft-nominated Lynn Tudor of New York City has finally become a winner in the Caption Contest! Her submission in Caption Contest 120 (Tom Cheney's Mr. Potato Head in bar):

"If I start to drink too much, just pull off my lips."

This victory brings New York to within one point of front-runner California. Exciting!


Lynn Tudor does not have a caption among the nominees in Caption Contest 122 (P.C. Vey's judge doing dishes):

"Yeah, well, it got me through college and law school, and it'll get me through here, too."
William Manning (Wichita, KS)

"If the jury needs another day, they're using paper plates tomorrow."
Emily Anhalt (Guilford, CT)

"I wish they'd let us wear short-sleeved robes."
Dean Kahn (Bellingham, WA)

I don't think I have my loser verbatim at the moment, but I believe it went something like this:

"That's the last time the jury gets its lunch from Masa."

It was "The jury ordered lunch from Masa."

Please compare with Emily Anhalt's submission.


In Anti-Caption Contest 123 (Leo Cullum's bull by smashed window with red curtain), the winner is

"Remember how you said Frank Miller and Gary Larson would never collaborate?"
A Silly Mus Musculus

My loser:

"If I've told you once, I've told you a million times: We'll leave the house and go back to the barn as soon as Farmer Jones and his family return from their trip, and no one will be the wiser...though of course there will now be questions about the window that you shattered in your typical, bull-headed way.

"Oh dear. Now that I think about it, I suppose it's curtains for us!"

Caption Contest 124 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 124 is here.


And the results of the Thanksgiving caption/anti-caption contests can be found here and here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all mapped out here.

20 California

19 New York (17 from the Big Apple)

10 New Jersey

6 Massachusetts
6 Pennsylvania

5 Virginia (two from Richmond)

4 Connecticut (two from New Haven, two not)
4 Illinois (three from Chicago, one from Lake Bluff)
4 Maryland (none named Mary)

3 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 North Carolina
3 Ohio
3 Texas

2 District of Columbia
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Rhode Island
2 Utah
2 Vermont

1 Alabama
1 Alaska
1 Arizona
1 Florida
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Michigan
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Washington

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Image by David Marc Fischer using Samsung cameraphone

CARTOON CAPTION/ANTI-CAPTION CONTESTS CONTINUE!

Let's begin with a cheer for Manhattanite Lynn Tudor, whose Caption Contest 120 (Tom Cheney's guy with giant Mr. Potato Head in bar) submission

"If I start to drink too much, just pull off my lips."

is at least his or her third nominee. Huzzah! Tudor already secured nominations weeks ago in Caption Contest 117 ("Welcome to the greatest living room on Earth!") and early this year in Caption Contest 80 ("Look, honey, it's the new Tickle Me Maniac.").

This time Tudor is up against

"My wife left me for Mr. Peanut."
Marla Mercer (Goleta, CA)

and

"I should have stopped after the Botox."
Sue Clifton (Pittsburgh, PA)

This was one of those occasions when it was hard to tell who was talking in the cartoon. Which partially explains my loser:

"Has anyone ever told you that you have beautiful eyes?"

As for the winner of Caption Contest 118 (Paul Noth's "angels" perched on giant eggs), it's

"I always figured Hell would be less ironic."
Ben Snyder (Charlottesville, VA)

Wahoo-wa, Ben—Virginia's now in a four-way tie for fifth place.


In Anti-Caption Contest 121 (Harry Bliss's conveyor belt carrying bushy eyebrow masks), the winner is

"Stealing company property? I'm afraid that's grounds for immediate dismissal."
Francis

My loser:

"Get off the line, McGillicuddy. It might be years after that chocolate episode, but you're still not fooling anyone with that disguise."

Caption Contest 122 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 122 is here.


And the latest on the Thanksgiving cartoon contests can be found here and here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all mapped out here.

20 California

18 New York (16 from the Big Apple)

10 New Jersey

6 Massachusetts
6 Pennsylvania

4 Connecticut (two from New Haven, two not)
4 Illinois (three from Chicago, one from Lake Bluff)
4 Maryland (none named Mary)
4 Virginia

3 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 North Carolina
3 Ohio
3 Texas

2 District of Columbia
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Rhode Island
2 Utah
2 Vermont

1 Alabama
1 Alaska
1 Arizona
1 Florida
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Michigan
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Washington

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Image by David Marc Fischer using Samsung cameraphone

CARTOON CAPTION/ANTI-CAPTION CONTESTS CONTINUE!

I preface this week's results with a nod to The Other Dave, who recently posted a pumpkin carved to resemble the cover of the October 29, 2007 New Yorker!


In Caption Contest 117 (Mick Stevens circus ring in living room), the winner is

"My wife will be here any moment. She's loading herself into the cannon as we speak."
Elizabeth Ruelas (New York, NY)

So that's another victory for New York as well as NY! You can learn more about Elizabeth Ruelas here.


In Caption Contest 119 (Danny Shanahan's full-grown man in cradle), the nominees are

"Make sure you burp him after his 11 A.M. conference call."
Ellen Teitel (Hoboken, NJ)

"He sleeps through the night as long as the market's stable."
Jim McNicholas (Brooklyn, NY)

"If he wakes up, you can give him a Martini."
Alan Schulman (Richmond, VA)

My loser:

"He's always tired after Jerry Springer."

In Anti-Caption Contest 120 (Tom Cheney's Mr. Potato Head in a bar), the winner is

"Wha... Where'd the genie go? Well, if he granted my wish, I'm now a big stud. But where's your twelve-inch pianist? Oh, I see. It's in your pants."
mypalmike

A finalist was

"[Silence, because potato-head statues don't talk, and the guy at the bar is just quizzically contemplating the odd decor.]"
John Tabin

I was working on a similar concept, but I kept quiet about it. Instead, my loser was

"Your hat is out of style. Don’t you have a visor cap? That would be much more in line with what the people wear today. It would help you to blend in better."

Caption Contest 121 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 121 is here.

And the latest on the Thanksgiving cartoon contests can be found here and here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all mapped out here.

20 California

18 New York (16 from the Big Apple)

10 New Jersey

6 Massachusetts
6 Pennsylvania

4 Connecticut (two from New Haven, two not)
4 Illinois (three from Chicago, one from Lake Bluff)
4 Maryland (none named Mary)

3 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 North Carolina
3 Ohio
3 Texas
3 Virginia

2 District of Columbia
2 Mississippi
2 Missouri
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Rhode Island
2 Utah
2 Vermont

1 Alabama
1 Alaska
1 Arizona
1 Florida
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Michigan
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Washington

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Image by David Marc Fischer using Samsung cameraphone

CARTOON CAPTION/ANTI-CAPTION CONTESTS CONTINUE!

Thanks again to Emdashes, this time for linking to Blog About Town's second, invaluable, guide to the first 100 winning New Yorker weekly cartoon captions.

And now, on to the latest results!


The winner of the Caption Contest 102 (two dogs watching dog toss stick) is

"He's his own best friend."
Jennifer Iverson (Santa Ynez, CA)

The nominees for Caption Contest 104 (cop car passing "bum" angels amidst clouds) are

"Except here it's always good cop, good cop."
Gary Rawitz (New York, NY)

"They have a really hard time meeting their quota."
Elizabeth Goldberg (Amenia, NY)

"I don't mind cops, but you'd think God would have let in at least one exhaust specialist."
Andy Leighton (Arlington, VA)

My loser?

I don't have access to it now, but I'm workin' on it! Nudge me if you feel like it. Ah yes: "They used to patrol Hell's Kitchen."

In Anti-Caption Contest 105 (Tom Cheney's picture of a tidal wave in a built-in pool), the winner is

"Let's get another lawn chair to go with the chaise longue, I says. No, you says, I'll just bring one out from the dining room when I want to sit by the pool. What about when it rains, I says. Oh, I'll be sure to take it in so it never gets wet, you says. Well I hope you're happy now, cheapskate!!!"
Vance

My loser:

"Looks like Al Gore was right--and it’s all Cheney’s fault!"

"Can’t you ever tear yourself away from the Tube?"

Caption Contest 106 is here. Anti-Caption Contest 106 is here.


THE STANDINGS

Here is the current New Yorker Cartoon Caption Contest breakdown by state. You can find it all mapped out here.

18 California

15 New York (13 from the Big Apple)

9 New Jersey

6 Massachusetts
6 Pennsylvania

4 Connecticut (two from New Haven, two not)

3 Georgia (includes two-time winner Carl Gables)
3 Illinois
3 Maryland (none named Mary)
3 Minnesota (Minneapolis 2, St. Paul 1)
3 North Carolina
3 Ohio

2 District of Columbia
2 New Hampshire
2 Oregon (both named Eric, both from Portland)
2 Rhode Island
2 Texas
2 Utah
2 Virginia

1 Alabama
1 Arizona
1 Florida
1 Iowa
1 Kentucky
1 Mississippi
1 Missouri
1 Nevada
1 New Mexico
1 Oklahoma
1 Vermont
1 Washington

Map Introduction

Thanks to Andriy Bidochko for Map Builder.

Image by David Marc Fischer using Samsung cameraphone